Equally Shared Parenting: A Website in Passive Aggression?

Who knows, perhaps I could be a wee bit defensive here, but does this rhetoric from the home page of Equally Shared Parenting (“Half the work; All the fun”) strike you as slightly disingenuous:

Welcome to EquallySharedParenting.com, the cyber home for fathers and mothers who have made (or wish to make) a conscious decision to share equally in the raising of their children, household chores, breadwinning, and time for recreation. This site is the brainchild of Marc and Amy Vachon, authors of the new book Equally Shared Parenting: Rewriting the Rules for a New Generation of Parents and equal parents ourselves.

With links on how you can both “share the housework” and “share the recreation,” just who do you think the target audience is here? Cause I don’t really think it’s socialist parenting partnerships. I’m thinking it’s working mothers who think their husbands aren’t pulling their weight. Just a guess.

Please check out the site and tell me I’m wrong. The pastel colors on the site made me so dizzy maybe I misread things.

Published by Theodore

Theodore Ross is an editor of Harper’s Magazine. His writing has appeared in Harper’s, Saveur, Tin House, the Mississippi Review, and (of course), the Vietnam News. He grew up in New York City by way of Gulfport, MS, and as a teen played the evil Nazi, Toht, in Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation. He lives with his son, J.P. in Brooklyn, and is currently working on a book about Crypto-Jews.

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3 Comments

  1. I’m sorry. I got stuck on the Equal Breadwinning. So both parters should hobble their careers in the name of pay equity? That sounds… rewarding.

    Oddly enough my wife and I don’t have equal skills. That’s actually something we like about each other. And we generally feel more rewarded when doing things that cater to our skills.

    I’m interested in how a plan that revolves around communicating on every little thing is going to work for people who are probably drawn to the program because they have trouble communicating.

  2. Theodore,
    It is unfortunate that you jumped to conclusions based on color and tired social assumptions. Our site is dedicated to just the opposite of what you fear. Equally shared parenting is not a man-manipulating plan. And as half of a couple dedicated to discouraging the manipulation of men (or women) to get them to do more around the house, I’m saddened by your post. Your commenter who assumes that pay equity is a goal of equally shared parenting may wish to check out our message a bit more thoroughly too.

    Best,
    Amy Vachon

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