I have seen some strange things this week—a Geronimo statue shaped like a sex toy, a hotel so shabby it seemed haunted—but nothing quite as wrong as the children’s book for sale at the Briarwood Country Club in Sun City West, just outside of Phoenix.
I was there to interview J.D. Hayworth, the Republican gunning for John McCain’s Senate seat. It was a $16-a-plate lasagna luncheon fundraiser for the Arizona Federation of Republican Women, and yes, on the table in front selling “Republican jewelry,” there was a stack of copies of a children’s book about politics.
It was written by a local writer. Topic: Republicans and patriotism. And though I can’t remember the name exactly, it might have well have been called “Democrats Are Douchebags.”
It featured a grandma (it was written for the elderly, country-luvin’ Sun City West crowd to give to their grandkids) nicknamed ‘Ree. Because she’s a REpublican. And every page was filled with earnest scenes of good Americans—planting gardens, saluting flags—and text about how Republicans love their country. It wasn’t just about America, mind you, or neighborliness. It was about partisan politics, every word ripped from an RNC memo.
“What exactly is the right age for kids to be reading about party politics?” I asked the woman selling the brochures and books.
“Three,” was the answer. “Or maybe four. No, I think three.”
Oh. My. God.
I have nothing against books depicting scouting and church-going or whatever else you think a hale citizenry should do. But partisan politics is filthy. It is a slimepit, a den of fornication, prevarication, and earmarking. Even if I vote for Democratic politicians, it doesn’t mean I want them around my children. Same with Republican politicians. Don’t let them kiss your babies and don’t read your babies books about them.
Lest anyone doubt that politics is an ocean of ick, consider the case last month of Roy Ashburn, the Republican California state senator who was fiercely gay and fiercely anti-immigrant, before he was caught drunk-driving just after he left a gay bar with some Latino man-candy. Are you gonna put that in a kids’ book?
Listen: One’s politics should reflect his values, not the other way around. Teach your kids your values—whatever they are—and let their politics flow from that when they’re older.
As it is, I think this a horrible idea for children’s literature—and I’m the DadWagoner who had a kiddie book about weed in his office. What a sad prospect for the next generation—that they, even more than baby boomers or ourselves, would grow up learning that that dividing line between good and evil is the Congressional aisle?