Give Me Your Stuff!

P3280044We had the baby shower for the upcoming child, Ellie, a name that Nathan reminded me the other day was actually the nickname for the cute little elephant statues awarded each year to some of the nation’s best magazine journalists. No, that was not intentional, and for those of you who believe in fate, I guess that means I will never win one.

Anyway, the shower was fun, our hosts were exceedingly generous, and all was right with the world. One thing that did give me pause was the sheer volume of stuff we received as gifts–all reasonably necessary and entirely appreciated, but still. Babies, as most parents realize, come with stuff, and lots of it. For a generally disorganized sort like me, having to contend with all these goods can be rather intimidating.

Which is why I’m making my girlfriend do it! Since I already have a child I can assert that she should deal with all the hoo-hah, as I’ve been through it once before. Which isn’t entirely true, as JP’s mother is compulsively organized and was on top of everything.

In one sense, though, I guess I am giving her a real lesson in parenting: Always pass the buck. And as she tends to work much longer hours than I do (with compensation to match) I’ll probably doing more than my share of heavy lifting down the road. So, actually, you see, this all fair to me, my pushing this stuff onto her.

Logic!

Published by Theodore

Theodore Ross is an editor of Harper’s Magazine. His writing has appeared in Harper’s, Saveur, Tin House, the Mississippi Review, and (of course), the Vietnam News. He grew up in New York City by way of Gulfport, MS, and as a teen played the evil Nazi, Toht, in Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation. He lives with his son, J.P. in Brooklyn, and is currently working on a book about Crypto-Jews.

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