I want you to know, first of all, that I hate dreams. In fiction, they’re too often used to convey psychological depth. And in reality, we stupidly rely on them to explain subconscious desires. But this one has stuck with me so long, and speaks to so many conscious issues I have, that I have …
Author Archives: Matt
Fingertip Amputation & Other Parenting Hazards
The first rule of hipsterdom is this: Thou shalt ridicule other hipsters for doing that which you yourself do. But does this apply to hipster parents? As best I can tell, yes. At least, this explains my reaction to the news that Maclaren is recalling 1 million strollers because their opening mechanism could, if sprung …
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Going Chernobyl
The baby is crying, screaming, thrashing, limp. The kid is in a diaper and socks, writhing on the floor, in the car seat, arms and legs alternately flailing and stiff. The kid is inconsolable, possessed by demons, a blubbering spastic. These children are, thank goodness, not mine. They’re on YouTube, the stars of a little-discussed …
Monster Dad Abuses Child, Writes About It
Who does this guy think he is? Subjecting low-budget bus travelers to the screams of his infant, and then at the same time neglecting to feed and change the kid. Should be brought up on charges, grumble grumble… New York Times… grumble, grumble…