Just got back from a weeklong trip to Las Vegas, and all I have to say is this: There’s nothing like walking in the door to find an ecstatic toddler calling your name and giving you a big hug. Don’t worry: This sappiness is just part of jetlag. I’ll be back to normal soon.
Author Archives: Matt
Bragging About Your Child: Form and Technique
Sasha is now just over 2 years old, and she’s talking—a lot. “Okay, let’s go outside!” she’ll say, and once we’re out on the disgusting streets of New York, she’ll point at patches of ice and say, “Slippery! Be careful.” She just goes and goes, and what she doesn’t know how to say in real …
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How My Daughter Has Ruined My Life: Vegas Edition
Las Vegas, I wish to inform you, is not an early-morning kind of town. Usually, if you’re up at 7 a.m. in Sin City, it’s because you were also up at 6 a.m., 5 a.m., 4 a.m., and all the a.m.’s stretching back to the post-meridianal hour when you first rose from your damp-sheeted hotel …
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AssBob GrassSkirt, or How I Am Failing My Daughter
After our vacation in Los Angeles, Sasha returned to New York with dangerous knowledge—the knowledge that there exists a cartoon character named SpongeBob. Or, as she calls him, AssBob. She may never have watched the show with the sound on, but she knows he’s there, and that her mother will, on request, draw a picture …
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