Man Up, Newsweek!

newsweekcoverIf you must know, I get most of my news and analysis from the Southern Baptist Convention, and this item is no different: Dr. Albert Mohler, president of Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, posted on his website a lengthy discussion of Newsweek’s omnibus “Whither Men?” cover package from this week.

Before I get to Dr. Mohler’s arguments, let me just say that I remain unconvinced of the journalistic value of the sprawling, multipaneled newsweekly cover package. I participated in the planning and writing of a number of these at Time, and it often seemed like we were struggling to have the packages succeed despite their format. Andrew Romano is a good writer and a good reporter, but his contribution this week, co-written with Tony Dokoupil, isn’t enhanced by sharing space in the same package with pieces about manly trends in advertising.

Maybe the newsweeklies just lost their authority to make big, sweeping arguments about issues like the New Masculinity. Maybe they never had the authority. Why is it so much more satisfying to read one deep, narrow take on a topic–like Nathan Hegedus’s description of his experience with the Swedish paternity state at Slate.com–than Newsweek’s half-newsy trendbomb approach?

Hegedus’s piece, by the way, is quoted liberally in the Newsweek article, and I again get the feeling that the newsweeklies’ most potent argument for themselves is that they’ve read it all so that you don’t have to, that you can read all the currently swirling arguments in one place, served up in breezy, engaging newsweekly prose. But if that’s the case, what makes them better than The Week? Yes, newsweeklies have an important commitment to actual reporting that The Week does not, but do readers care anymore? Are newsweeklies even living up to that reporting commitment?

Alrighty then! You are likely here because you’ve used your ovaries for their godly purpose or have at some point seeded someone else’s ovaries and therefore care about parenting. So I’ll wrap up the media criticism and get to Dr. Mohler’s take on the new masculinity:

Of course, the call for men to be more engaged with their children is never wrong. Indeed, in this case, the political Left is picking up on themes long driven by the Right, and by conservative Christians in particular. The difference is that the Christian concern for asserting a man’s responsibility and fulfillment in fatherhood is not about social egalitarianism. Rather, it is driven by a biblical conception of true manhood as defined through the roles of husband and father.

Still, as much as we might complain about Newsweek’s rather predictable tip of the hat to the welfare state and the end of many gender distinctions, there is a sense in which the writers come very close to getting a big point just right.

They explain:

The truth is, it’s not how men style themselves that will make them whole again—it’s what they do with their days. The riggers, welders, and boilermakers of generations past weren’t wearing overalls to feel like men, as Susan Faludi, the author of books on both sexes, has pointed out. Instead, “their sense of their own manhood flowed out of their utility in a society, not the other way around,” she writes. “Conceiving of masculinity as something to be”—a part to play—“turns manliness into [something] ornamental, and about as ‘masculine’ as fake eyelashes are inherently ‘feminine.’?

We may be surprised to find ourselves in agreement with Susan Faludi here, but she is absolutely right. Our fathers and grandfathers did not put on overalls to play dress up. They were headed for work. Faludi is profoundly right when she writes that “their sense of their own manhood flowed out of their utility in a society, not the other way around.”

A true masculinity is grounded in a man’s determination to fulfill his manhood in being a good husband, father, citizen, worker, leader, and friend—one who makes a difference, fulfills a role for others, and devotes his life to these tasks. Most of our fathers went to work early and toiled all day because they knew it was their duty to put bread on the table, a roof over our heads, and a future in front of us. They made their way to ball games and school events dead tired, went home and took care of things, and then got up and did it all over again the next day.

Today’s men are likely to be more nurturing, but they are also statistically less faithful. They may be changing more diapers, but they are also more likely to change spouses. Men must be encouraged and expected to be both faithful fathers and faithful husbands. Otherwise, any society is in big trouble.

If the Southern Baptist Convention’s main thought-cop is surprised to be in agreement with Susan Faludi, then consider how surprised I am to be in agreement (partially) with him. Of course, his hyperpolitical (and un-Christian) swipes at a social safety net–what he flintily calls the welfare state–are bogus. But he has a powerful truth hidden in here somewhere: the right and the left both like good fathers.

Now, one side will support these good fathers (the, ahem, Swedish side), while the other will simply pray for them. But still, it’s good to know that what we do as Involved Dads is lauded across the spectrum. And also, not incidentally, by our children. Bully for us!

Creepiest Kids’ Movies of All Time!

I do and don’t understand the allure of “top ten” or “best of all time” lists. On the I-don’t-get-it front, lists are lazy, and they actually make you dumber (this has been scientifically proven). On the do-understand aspect of the debate–I’m lazy and stupid. So there you go. How about this one, via Babble, on the 26 Most Disturbing Kids Movies Ever?

Why 26? Who knows? Maybe they’re too lazy or stupid to pick a logical number like 13 or 9. But any list that includes both Bambi (they shoot the mother) and The Neverending Movie Story is worth a quick glance.

Which is what you should give it.

The Mobile Mothers of Ireland

Last night I returned to New York after nine long days spent driving around Ireland. Usually, when I’m on one of these trips, I come back with some profoundly clever observation about parenthood abroad.

Not this time. For some reason or other, I just didn’t see much of parents interacting with their kids. Which may in itself be strange.

But I did see one phenomenon that struck me as odd: young mothers pushing prams (what we know as “strollers”) down long, empty sidewalks. It’s not the strangest thing, I guess, but I was driving a lot of small roads, and then I’d look over and see these women trucking along on a sidewalk, with almost nothing else in the vicinity. Where were they coming from, or going to?

It was mysterious, and a little sad.

Katy Perry Causes Hipster Schizophrenia

Entertaining item over at Gawker: Katy Perry filmed a takeoff of her song “Hot ‘N Cold” for Sesame Street, with Elmo, and the dress she wore is considered too cleavagey for PBS, so the clip won’t air.

But what’s fun about that post is not the segment (which, if you ask me, is no big deal; the dress comes off like a princess costume, not a slinky awards-show thing). No, it’s the  commentariat at Gawker, trying to parse what is the appropriately cool and detached stance on this. Because they found at least three ways to sneer at it:

• Why the hell is wholesome Sesame Street consorting with the most plasticky pop star around? Please.

• Why the hell is she wearing that boobalicious dress on Sesame Street? Oh please.

• Why the hell is this a problem? Get over your prudery. It’s just a dress, and she’s even covered up on top with a little mesh something-or-other. Please.

Not to mention a few jabs at her fashion sense, which (frankly) is where I came down on the whole matter. The dress isn’t dangerous or inappropriate, but it’s almost comically tacky. Oh, and the clever dude who posted “This clip was brought to you by the letters ‘T’ and ‘A.'” An easy joke, but a good one.